Stroll – Mytholmroyd

I went for a quick stroll with Lisa and Maisie today out along the Calder Valley Cycleway and back along the Rochdale canal towpath. It was a lovely day and it should have been a fine walk but yet again we discovered that long stretches of the path were covered in dog crap.

Somebody has been going along sticking little flags in it saying “Please pick up your dog's poo” but I think that it is a hopeless gesture – selfish, stupid people are not going to see that and suddenly think “Oh dear, I hadn't realised that it was a problem.” No, they will think what they do now – “My dog gives a shit, but frankly mate – I'm afraid that don't!

Dog owners who don't ‘pick up' should be set upon by large men armed with baseball bats. A quick blow to the back of the knees will knock a miscreant to the ground where (s)he can have her/his face shoved in the shit left behind for the rest of us to step in or ride through. After that, march them to the nearest ATM and force them to withdraw £250 for an on-the-spot fine. For a second offence fine them £1,000, take their dog(s) away from them, ban them for life from dog ownership, and take their car away from them and crush it!

Yes – I'm angry! 👿

On a lighter note – a very rare treat – toasted cheese and onion sandwiches with coffee back at Innovation – yummy!

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